The Jaipur Literature Festival (JLF), often described as the "greatest literary show on Earth," has long served as a global stage for the convergence of diverse voices, bridging the gap between Eastern traditions and Western narratives. In its 2022 iteration, which continued to embrace the reach of virtual platforms, the festival hosted a poignant and revelatory conversation between two titans of the South Asian diaspora: Canadian actor, comedian, and author Lilly Singh, and acclaimed American novelist Neel Patel.
The session, held on the third day of the festival’s virtual program, centered on Patel’s debut novel, Tell Me How to Be. As the first-ever selection for Lilly Singh’s newly formed book club, the novel has quickly ascended to the status of a cultural touchstone. The dialogue between Singh and Patel went far beyond a mere promotional exchange, delving into the complexities of the immigrant experience, the burden of familial secrets, and the historical lack of nuanced South Asian representation in Western media.
Main Facts: A Debut Novel Becomes a Cultural Landmark
At the heart of the discussion was Tell Me How to Be, a novel that Lilly Singh admitted she "dived into" with an emotional intensity that demanded public discussion. The book follows the parallel lives of a mother and son—Renu and Akash—as they navigate their respective secrets while preparing to sell their family home in Illinois. Akash, a struggling musician in Los Angeles, is grappling with his identity as a gay man and the looming shadow of an unrequited past love, while Renu is haunted by the memory of a man she loved before her arranged marriage.
The significance of this session lies in the intersection of two influential figures. Lilly Singh, who rose to global fame as "Superwoman" on YouTube, has transitioned into a multifaceted media mogul and an advocate for diverse storytelling. Her endorsement of Patel’s work through her book club signifies a shift in how South Asian narratives are curated and consumed. For Patel, the novel represents a departure from the "model minority" myth, offering instead a raw, "steamy," and often painful look at the realities of being "othered" within one’s own community and country.
During the interview, Patel revealed that the genesis of the book was deeply personal. "I wrote it for anyone who felt what I felt—that I did not belong here and who I was, was wrong," he told Singh. This sentiment of existential displacement served as the foundation for the session, highlighting a shared experience among many first- and second-generation immigrants.
Chronology: From Personal Catharsis to Global Recognition
The journey of Tell Me How to Be from a private manuscript to a JLF highlight follows a trajectory of increasing cultural relevance:
- The Writing Process: Patel described the act of writing as a form of self-discovery. He noted that while he initially intended to tell a story about an Indian-origin boy in America, the process unearthed suppressed memories. The character of Akash became a vessel for Patel to explore the weight of expectations and the trauma of invisibility.
- The Selection: Lilly Singh launched her book club with the intent of highlighting voices that are often sidelined by the mainstream literary establishment. Tell Me How to Be was chosen as the inaugural pick due to its emotional resonance and its refusal to sanitize the South Asian experience.
- The JLF Session (Day 3): The virtual session began with Singh expressing her deep emotional connection to the characters. She moved the conversation from the technical aspects of writing to the visceral impact of the story, questioning Patel on his intended audience and his fears regarding the book’s reception.
- Post-Release Reflection: Patel admitted that the reality of the book’s release brought a sense of vulnerability. He quipped that while writing, an author is "just in the story," but the moment of publication brings the sudden realization: "Oh god! People are going to read this!"
- The Response: The session concluded with a discussion on the "enormous power of literature," as Patel reflected on the unexpected ways in which readers from various backgrounds connected with the specific struggles of an Indian-American family.
Supporting Data: The Landscape of South Asian Representation
To understand the weight of Patel’s conversation with Singh, one must look at the historical context of South Asian representation in the United States and Canada. Patel noted that during his formative years, representation was "minimal."
Historically, South Asians in Western media were often relegated to caricatures—think Apu from The Simpsons—or limited to the high-glamour, escapist lens of Bollywood. Patel remarked that while Bollywood provided a "nice escape," it rarely mirrored the lived reality of a child growing up in the American Midwest.
The turning point for Patel, and many of his contemporaries, was the emergence of Jhumpa Lahiri in the late 1990s. Lahiri’s Pulitzer Prize-winning Interpreter of Maladies (1999) and her subsequent novel The Namesake (2003) acted as "trailblazers." Patel credited Lahiri with making the career of a writer seem "possible" for someone of his background.
However, even with the "Lahiri era," the narrative often remained focused on the "immigrant’s struggle" with tradition versus modernity. Patel’s work represents the "New Wave" of South Asian literature—one that includes LGBTQ+ identities, sexual frankness, and a rejection of the pressure to be "respectable" to the white gaze. This shift is reflected in the demographic data of the diaspora; according to the U.S. Census Bureau and Pew Research, the South Asian population is one of the fastest-growing and most diverse in North America, yet their literary representation has only recently begun to catch up with their internal diversity.

Official Responses and Key Dialogue
The session was punctuated by moments of humor and profound honesty. Lilly Singh, known for her candid personality, brought a lighthearted yet probing touch to the interview.
On the "Steamy" Nature of the Book:
Singh jokingly asked Patel if he was scared of any specific groups reading the book. "My mom follows my book club and she read the book. There is some steamy stuff in there," she laughed. This comment highlights a common tension in South Asian households: the disconnect between the private lives of the younger generation and the traditional sensibilities of their parents. Patel responded by acknowledging that the "authorial trance" prevents such fears during the creative process, only for them to surface once the work becomes public property.
On the Character of Akash:
Patel explained that Akash’s struggle with his sexuality and his attempt to "come out" was not just a plot point but a reflection of the "weighing down" he felt in his own life. He noted that it was only through Akash’s voice that he could process his own memories of feeling like an outsider.
On the Power of Literature:
Responding to the positive reception of the novel, Patel stated, "That is the enormous power of literature. It was so unexpected how many people really connected to the story." This sentiment echoes the festival’s overarching theme: that the specific becomes universal through honest storytelling.
Implications: A New Era for the Diaspora Narrative
The conversation between Patel and Singh at JLF 2022 has several broader implications for the literary and cultural landscape:
1. The Normalization of the "Taboo"
By discussing sexuality, secrets, and "steamy" content openly, Patel and Singh are helping to dismantle the "culture of shame" (or log kya kahenge—"what will people say") that has historically governed South Asian domestic life. Tell Me How to Be suggests that healing only begins when secrets are aired, a message that resonates deeply with a generation of South Asians seeking mental health advocacy and authentic self-expression.
2. The Influence of the "Celebrity Book Club"
Lilly Singh’s endorsement serves as a powerful engine for discovery. Much like Oprah’s Book Club or Reese Witherspoon’s "Hello Sunshine," Singh’s platform provides a bridge for authors like Patel to reach audiences who might not typically browse the "Literary Fiction" section. This democratization of literary taste-making ensures that diverse stories are not just written, but read and discussed.
3. The Future of the South Asian "Canon"
Patel’s acknowledgement of Jhumpa Lahiri as a trailblazer highlights a lineage of South Asian writing that is now expanding. We are moving from a "minimal" representation to a "maximal" one, where authors feel empowered to write stories that are not representative of the entire community, but are deeply true to a specific experience. This shift allows for more complexity, including the exploration of queer identities within the diaspora.
4. The Role of JLF in a Digital World
The fact that this session reached a global audience through virtual streaming underscores the evolving role of literary festivals. No longer confined to the Diggi Palace in Jaipur, these conversations are now accessible to a teenager in the American Midwest or a student in London, providing the very "representation" that Patel lacked during his own childhood.
In conclusion, the dialogue between Neel Patel and Lilly Singh at the Jaipur Literature Festival 2022 was more than a book talk; it was a celebration of the "unbelonging" that eventually leads to a more profound sense of self. Through Tell Me How to Be, Patel has not only found his own voice but has provided a mirror for countless others who have spent their lives searching for their reflection in the pages of a book. As the South Asian diaspora continues to evolve, sessions like these serve as vital markers of how far the community has come—and how many more stories are yet to be told.
