JAIPUR — In a profound exploration of heritage, secrecy, and the complexities of the immigrant experience, the 2022 Jaipur Literature Festival (JLF) featured a landmark conversation between acclaimed American author Neel Patel and global entertainer Lilly Singh. The virtual session, held during the third day of the world-renowned festival, centered on Patel’s debut novel, Tell Me How to Be, a work that has rapidly ascended to the forefront of contemporary South Asian-American literature.
The dialogue served as more than a promotional stop for a new book; it was a deep dive into the psychological landscape of the diaspora. Singh, whose book club "Lilly’s Library" selected Patel’s novel as its inaugural pick, led a discussion that touched upon the scarcity of representation in Western media, the burden of familial expectations, and the cathartic power of the written word.
Main Facts: A Debut Novel Captures the Global Spotlight
Neel Patel’s Tell Me How to Be has been heralded as a seminal work in the "New Indian-American" canon. The novel follows the dual perspectives of Akash, a gay singer-songwriter struggling with his career and sobriety in Los Angeles, and his mother, Renu, who is preparing to sell the family home in Illinois following the death of her husband. As the two come together to pack up their lives, a series of long-buried secrets regarding Renu’s first love and Akash’s hidden identity come to the surface.
Lilly Singh, a Canadian actor, comedian, and former late-night talk show host, expressed a visceral connection to the text. "I dived into the story and the characters. The book was extremely emotional," Singh remarked during the session. Her endorsement is significant; as a pioneer for South Asian representation in digital and mainstream media, Singh’s curation of Patel’s work signals a shift in the types of stories being championed within the community—moving away from sanitized "model minority" myths toward messy, authentic human experiences.
The core of the conversation revolved around the "why" of the book. Patel revealed that the novel was born from a place of personal necessity. He noted that while the book is a gift to readers who feel marginalized, its primary audience during the drafting process was himself.
Chronology: From Minimal Representation to Literary Trailblazing
The session at JLF 2022 traced the evolution of Patel’s perspective as a writer, contextualizing his work within the history of South Asian representation in the United States.
The Era of Invisibility
Patel reflected on his upbringing in the American Midwest, a period defined by a lack of relatable figures in popular culture. In the 1990s and early 2000s, South Asian characters in Hollywood were often relegated to caricatures or peripheral roles defined by their accents or "otherness."
"While growing up, the South-Asian representation in America was minimal," Patel told Singh. He noted that while Bollywood provided a "nice escape," the heightened melodrama and traditional values of Indian cinema often felt disconnected from the lived reality of a second-generation Indian-origin boy navigating the suburbs of America.
The Jhumpa Lahiri Catalyst
The turning point for Patel came during his college years when he discovered the works of Pulitzer Prize winner Jhumpa Lahiri. He cited her as a "trailblazer" who legitimized the Indian-American experience in the literary world. Lahiri’s ability to weave the mundane details of immigrant life into high literature made writing seem like a viable path for Patel. However, where Lahiri focused on the initial shock of immigration and cultural preservation, Patel’s generation of writers is now interrogating the internal conflicts of identity, including sexuality and the subversion of traditional gender roles.
The Creative Process
Patel described the writing of Tell Me How to Be as an unintentional journey into his own past. By channeling his emotions through the character of Akash, Patel was forced to confront memories and feelings of "not belonging" that he had suppressed for decades. The transition from writing for himself to becoming a published author was a jarring one, culminating in the 2022 JLF session where he reflected on the "enormous power of literature" to bridge individual isolation and collective understanding.
Supporting Data: The Changing Landscape of South Asian Narrative
The success of Patel’s novel and its prominence at JLF 2022 is supported by a growing trend in the publishing industry. According to industry reports, there has been a 35% increase in the publication of South Asian-authored fiction in the U.S. and U.K. over the last decade. Furthermore, the "Queer South Asian" sub-genre has seen a significant uptick, as authors like Patel, Fatimah Asghar, and Huma Qureshi challenge the conservative boundaries of their heritage.
During the interview, Singh highlighted the specific dual-narrative structure of the book. By giving equal voice to the mother (Renu) and the son (Akash), Patel effectively bridges a generational divide. This structure reflects a broader cultural data point: the "intergenerational trauma" conversation that has become a staple of modern diaspora discourse. By exploring Renu’s secret past, Patel humanizes the "immigrant mother" figure, moving her beyond the trope of the overbearing parent into a woman with her own unfulfilled desires and regrets.
Official Responses and Dialogue: The "Steam" and the Secrets
One of the more lighthearted yet poignant moments of the session occurred when Singh questioned Patel about the explicit nature of some scenes in the book. Singh, known for her candid and humorous rapport, asked if Patel was "scared of any group" reading the book—specifically parents.
"My mom follows my book club and she read the book. There is some steamy stuff in there," Singh laughed, pointing to the often-taboo nature of sexuality in South Asian households.
Patel’s response highlighted the psychological insulation required for creative honesty. "When you’re writing something, you are not thinking about anything else. You’re just in the story," he explained. He admitted that the realization of public consumption only hits once the book is slated for release. "It is only when the book is about to come out that you’re like, ‘Oh god! People are going to read this!’"
This exchange underscored a recurring theme in the interview: the bravery required to be vulnerable in a community where "saving face" (the concept of Log Kya Kahenge or "What will people say?") is often a dominant social force. Patel’s willingness to include "steamy" content and honest depictions of queer intimacy serves as a direct challenge to these cultural silences.
Implications: A New Era of Diasporic Storytelling
The conversation between Patel and Singh at the Jaipur Literature Festival carries significant implications for the future of global literature and cultural identity.
1. The Normalization of Intersectionality
Patel’s work signifies a move toward "intersectional" storytelling. It is no longer enough to just be "Indian-American"; the narratives now explore what it means to be Indian-American and queer, or Indian-American and struggling with mental health. This granularity allows for a more authentic representation that resonates with a global audience, regardless of their specific ethnic background.
2. The Power of Influence
Lilly Singh’s involvement demonstrates the evolving role of the "influencer" as a cultural curator. By using her platform to elevate Patel’s voice, Singh is actively participating in the decolonization of the literary canon, ensuring that stories about people of color are given the same prestige and visibility as those of their white counterparts.
3. The Role of JLF in the Virtual Space
As JLF continues to host virtual sessions, it democratizes access to high-level intellectual discourse. The fact that an American author and a Canadian entertainer can discuss the nuances of identity on an Indian platform highlights the borderless nature of the modern South Asian experience.
4. Healing Through Narrative
Ultimately, the session emphasized that literature serves as a tool for healing. Patel’s admission that he wrote the book for "anyone who felt what I felt—that I did not belong here and who I was, was wrong" suggests that the next generation of South Asian literature will be focused on internal reconciliation rather than external assimilation.
As the session concluded, it was clear that Neel Patel’s Tell Me How to Be is not just a story about a mother and a son; it is a manifesto for a generation that is tired of hiding. Through the support of figures like Lilly Singh and platforms like the Jaipur Literature Festival, these stories are finally finding their way out of the shadows and into the hands of readers who have long been waiting to see themselves reflected on the page.
About the Jaipur Literature Festival:
Often described as the "greatest literary show on Earth," JLF is an annual event that brings together a diverse mix of the world’s greatest writers, thinkers, humanitarians, politicians, business leaders, and entertainers to champion the freedom to express and engage.
About Neel Patel:
Neel Patel is a first-generation Indian-American. His debut short story collection, If You See Me, Don’t Say Hi, was a New York Times Book Review Editor’s Choice. Tell Me How to Be is his first novel.
About Lilly Singh:
Lilly Singh is a multi-faceted entertainer, author, and founder of Unicorn Island Productions. She has gained worldwide fame for her YouTube channel "IISuperwomanII" and her trailblazing work in late-night television.
